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August 29th, 2007
02:30 am - ...
I feel awkward whenever i leave LJ for a bit then come back.. i don't know.. i have been going threw a lot of stuff... family issues, work issues, living situations..... so lets start at the first.
Family. They are getting to the point where they are only out to hurt me, and by hurt i mean mental, emotionally, and physically. Mentally they have this way of just shutting you down and throwing your feelings to the side.. like "oh don't worry about saving dinner for Anna, she doesn't really need it" (one of the things i heard in the background while i was on the phone with my friend who was at the house talking with my mom and dad.. and no, My mom wasn't kidding.. and no.. its not because i had eaten, which I hadn't, its her little insult that she has always said since i was little.) Emotionally... My mom and the rest of my family try to guilt trip me into things.. like they will be completely rude to me, and yell at me, and scream at me.. then two seconds later turn around and try to act nice... but when i say no.. they are like "but i'm your _(insert so and so's relation)_ you have tol help me" or there is Physically.. where my brother will punch me, whip me, or do anything else to hurt me.. including throwing shoes at my head.
Work issues... oh yes.. new job, excellent.. do I know when i have to turn this stuff in.. no... Hallmark.. have i been busting my ass to get a raise and a promotion... YES.. do I? No.. instead for the SECOND TIME a girl I TRAINED gets promoted.. why? because she has a car. BIG WOOP. If th4ey would have talked to me they would have know I was going to use this second job as a way to pay off my car insurance.
LIving Situations. I'm getting to the point again where Me and my family fight all day, every day, no matter where.. and it gets so frustrating.. because i want to go home and relax and calm down and instead i have to come home and make dinner then listen to my parents yell at me for something really stupid or because they need someone to take there work day out on.
honestly.. my life makes my mind so fatigued that i have been stuttering.. and my mind makes my vocabulary all dyslexic like... like.. it mixes up my words while i am speaking.. and i have to go back and say the sentence like three times.. *sigh*... i don't know.. i just want to run.. run and finally be happy.. i was happy for like two weeks.. now its starting to wear off and the only times I am truly happy now are when I am at church...
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April 29th, 2007
01:14 am
for a while this weekend i was happy.. a day and a half.
Then.. its the constant reminder how much my parents are annoying me... God. I love them. but they need to shut up or at least support me.
My mother. UGggg!
She wonders why i don't tell her anything.
lets see here.. i believe her quote to me telling me "grab it by the balls and get over it" when she told me to do something i hate (I can't touch raw meat. i seriously freak out and start crying). I started shaking then started crying because of it.. then she just looked at me and yelled "you need to see a shrink! Your pathetic!"
and people wonder why i want out.
SHE wonders why i turn up the music when she trys to talk to me.
SHE wonders why i want to move out.
I wonder why i am not gone yet, and how, somehow, I am still living.
and i have realized... i know very little about my moms past.. i know more about Tristan's then hers. ... and truthfully... I am liking that more and more.
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April 10th, 2006
07:59 am - HAHAHAHA! Its sent! I can Sleep!
Anna Nelson
Ms. Howell 12-6
April 9th, 2006
The Time Traveler’s Wife
The Waiting Game
Waiting is an essential part of living. Many people do not enjoy it but the pain that comes with it can prepare you for the future. In the Book The Time Traveler’s Wife, the author, Audrey Niffenegger, shows us that waiting is painful.
The first time we as readers encounter a characters pain in the book is in the very beginning. In fact, it is in the prologue. Clare is a woman who grows up knowing Henry, a man who uncontrollably time travels, but is always waiting for him. Clare shares her pain of having Henry always popping in and out of her life by sharing with us that “Each moment that I wait feels like a year, an eternity. Each moment is slow and transparent as glass.”(VII) She tells us about her waiting early on so we understand that she is in pain when he is away from her. It is because she has to wait at home “where I cannot follow” (VII) as she says later, that really lets the reader feel where it is that she is coming from. She is not able to be with him in the present because he has yet to experience the past.
When Henry reveals to Clare the night he is going to die they sit out on their balcony and wait for his death. “I can’t believe this. I knew that it was coming, soon, had to come sooner or later, but here it is, and we are just lying here, waiting…”(511) is all Clare can think about as her husbands future is literally about to be destroyed by the past. Pain cannot even begin to describe the way Clare must be feeling at this point and time in her life. Clare has to sit back and do nothing but wait with Henry for the inevitable to happen to him. There is nothing she can do to postpone Henrys pain or hers.
After Henry dies, to prep Clare for life after him, he leaves behind a note for her that states, “I hate to think of you waiting. I know that you have been waiting for me all your life, always uncertain of how long this path of waiting might be. Ten minutes, ten days. A month. What an uncertain husband I have been…” (519) even though she is the one that is waiting, he is feeling her pain. We readers can truly relate to what Henry is feeling about leaving Clare so many times. After all, by this time, the reader has experienced Clare being alone while Henry is in the past many times. “…Clare is always left behind waiting--waiting for Henry to return, waiting to find out where he’s been, and waiting to discover his condition when he comes back to her.” (Beth Cholette, Amazon.com) Each time he vanishes, she is left at home. In a car, an empty bed, or an empty house. As Henry said. Sometimes this means she is alone for minutes, days, and sometimes months, waiting without him.
Niffenegger’s characters in The Time Traveler’s Wife come across strong with trying to show how much they care for each other. If Clare did not love Henry as much as she did, there would have been no chance of her waiting and suffering as much pain as Clare did. However, what really shows there bond is that Henry and Clare stuck together to the very end despite how painful waiting is.
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07:04 am - meeeeeeeeeeeeeehhhhhhhhhhhhhh 3
Waiting is an essential part of living. Many people do not enjoy it but the pain that comes with it can prepare you for the future. In the Book The Time Travels Wife, the author, Audrey Niffenegger, shows us that waiting is painful.
The first time we as readers encounter a characters pain in the book is in the very beginning. In fact, it is in the prologue. Clare is a woman who grows up knowing Henry, a man who uncontrollably time travels, but is always waiting for him. Clare shares her pain of having Henry always popping in and out of her life by sharing with us that “Each moment that I wait feels like a year, an eternity. Each moment is slow and transparent as glass.”(VII) She tells us about her waiting early on so we understand that she is in pain when he is away from her. It is because she has to wait at home “where I cannot follow”(VII) as she says later, that really lets the reader feel where it is that she is coming from.
When Henry reveals to Clare the night he is going to die they sit out on their balcony and wait for his death. “I can’t believe this. I knew that it was coming, soon, had to come sooner or later, but here it is, and we are just lying here, waiting…”(511) is all Clare can think about as her husbands future is literally about to be destroyed by the past. Pain cannot even begin to describe the way Clare must be feeling at this point and time in the story.
After Henry dies is, surprisingly, when a lot of the actual waiting occurs. To prep Clare for life after him he leaves behind a note for her that states, “I hate to think of you waiting. I know that you have been waiting for me all your life, always uncertain of how long this path of waiting might be. Ten minutes, ten days. A month. What an uncertain husband I have been…” (519) even though she is the one that is waiting, he is feeling her pain. We readers can truly relate to what Henry is feeling about leaving Clare some many times.
Current Location: stuck to the computer screen
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/niaha/kitty/anktiredg.gif) tired
Current Music: Mother Earth <~> Within Temptation
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05:42 am - mehhhhhhhhhhhh 2
Waiting is an essential part of living. Many people do not enjoy it but the pain that comes with it can prepare you for the future. In the Book The Time Travels Wife, the author, Audrey Niffenegger, shows us that waiting is painful.
The first time we as readers encounter a characters pain in the book is in the very beginning. In fact, it is in the prologue. Clare is a woman who grows up knowing Henry, a man who uncontrollably time travels, but is always waiting for him. Clare shares her pain of having Henry always popping in and out of her life by sharing with us that “Each moment that I wait feels like a year, an eternity. Each moment is slow and transparent as glass.” She tells us about her waiting early on so we understand that she is in pain when he is away from her. It is because she has to wait at home “where I cannot follow” as she says later, that really lets the reader feel where it is that she is coming from.
After Henry reveals to Clare the night he is going to die they sit out on their balcony and wait for his death. “I can’t believe this. I knew that it was coming, soon, had to come sooner or later, but here it is, and we are just lying here, waiting…” is all Clare can think about as her husbands future is literally about to be destroyed by the past. Pain cannot even begin to describe the way Clare must be feeling at this point and time in the story.
~~
I forgot to put in an outside sourceeeeeee! Fuck! ugggggggggggggggggggggggggg! how the heck... i was jsut figuring out my outline for this thing.. had it downt o a science.. now i need to add this... i have 2 hours and 15 mto find this! ugg!
Current Location: The Torture Dungeon.... I mean.. My basement
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/niaha/kitty/ankangryg.gif) bitchy
Current Music: Look at me rocking out, i'm on the radio <~>System of a Down
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04:44 am - mehhhhh
Waiting is an essential part of living. Many people do not enjoy it but the pain that comes with it can prepare you for the future. In the Book The Time Travels Wife, the author, Audrey Niffenegger, shows us that waiting is painful.
The first time we as readers encounter a characters pain in the book is in the very beginning. In fact, it is in the prologue. Clare is a woman who grows up knowing Henry, a man who uncontrollably time travels, but is always waiting for him. Clare shares her pain of having Henry always popping in and out of her life by sharing with us that “Each moment that I wait feels like a year, an eternity. Each moment is slow and transparent as glass.” She tells us about her waiting early on so we understand that she is in pain when he is away from her. It is because she has to wait at home “where I cannot follow” as she says, later, that really lets the reader feel where it is that she is coming from.
~~~
Ugggg! Sooo tired.. need sleep.. its almost 5 am.. and this is due by 8 am in my teachers e-mail... god i want sleeeeep. i took a very short ten minute nap and am now sucking on very cold bitter coffee thats been slightly reheated from yesterday morning. uggg. so tired. so, so, so tired.
Coffee and my phone going off every ten minutes saying I have a low battery is a the few things keeping me awake. the lilting music i have playing goes back and forth between tired music and get up and dance kind... so i have to watch what i play so i can focus but stay awake.
But I must get this in to Ms. Howell.. I need to show her that i can do this. (even though I can't) i need to show her that i try.. that I atleast TRY to do my best.*sigh*
back to work on this.
Current Mood: aggravated
Current Music: Nora <~> Blessed Union of Souls
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April 28th, 2005
11:41 am - Hi... I am privatizing.
im kinda sick of people i dont know reading certain posts.. it annoys the heck out of me. so im making my journal friends only.
welcome to my zone.
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